The Trick Is... To Get There First.

Sal and I went to a luncheon with my folks yesterday, this kinda stuff is almost always high adventure for me and usually results in Sally at some point laughing and saying "You're awful".

Eh well, I do what I gotta do.

So they'd invited us to go to this deal with 'em, followed by a play at the local theater. The lunch was to be at 12:30 so in the interest of having plenty of time to get there... they came to our house at 11:00 AM in order to make the 15 minute drive to the luncheon in time. See, my Dad is a firm believer in the notion that if you get somewhere waaaayyyy before you're supposed to be there, people and circumstances will re-orientate themselves in order to oblige his own personal time frame. Believe it or not, some times it works, but mostly it doesn't and then he gets agitated and tries to rationalize out for everyone else why it should've gone the way he had it figured out in his head.

Make sense? No? Okay, here's a for instance. Doctor appointments. I take them both to them quite a bit, everyone needs a hobby... and I guarantee you that if they have a 11:00 AM appointment, they will want to be there at 8:30 "Just in case they can work us in earlier." Now my logic with this is simple, either make an early appointment to begin with (in their cases they'd probably want to get there the day before) or go on with my normal life and show up at the 11:00 AM appointment at 10:59.

I can remember several instances where their early plan actually worked. Of course my Dad will go to the receptionist, make buddies with her, tell her how he needs to get outta there to go eat at exactly noon and then.... give her candy. I'm amazed at how many receptionists in this old world can be bought off with the little individual sized pieces of Hershey's milk chocolate with an almond in it. His success with this maneuver is frequent enough that if I were single and looking, I'd be dragging around a bag of chocolate and administering it to every single looking receptionist and waitress in the tri-state area. I'm serious... and yet I don't "get it."

Anyhow, yesterday. We are the first people there, we knew that one was coming, we're always the first with my folks. They chose the table that we'd be sitting at at this buffet style luncheon being catered by an awesome local catering and BBQ business. Dad was happy with his seating. He had it all analyzed that we'd be very near the first table to traipse past the buffet.

We waited.

An announcement was made, instructions on how they were gonna herd about 150-200 people through this buffet line......... and those instructions put our table very near the end.

Panic.

Immediately Dad started rationalizing out loud how they SHOULD have herded us all through. I'm cracking up.

Dad: This is wrong. By the time that long table gets through, that other long table is going to be worked in the line and put us even further back.

Me: *whispering to Sal, and we're directly in front of my mom and dad* He's almost ruined.

Sal: *giggles* You're awful.

Mom: You really picked the wrong table Benny.

Now this kinda comment really gets him all ate up and mom knows it... and sends Dad into further autonomous discussion about how things SHOULD have gone.

Our line slowly snakes forward, the whole time dad is talking to me about how long it's gonna take to get food and sit down and how wrong this is going for him. I'm still giggling. Sally is giggling.

Suddenly Sal elbows me and says, "Look at your mom!"

Mom has jumped line, took a side detour around the outside and got herself up at the buffet a good 25 people ahead of us.

I'm in near hysterics at this point. Dad punches me in the back and says "Look at your mother!! How the hell did she get up there? LOOK! She started a whole 'nuther damned line! We'll never get up there."

And she had, a whole new line of white headed folks had followed her lead like sheep to the trough and now the new line was blocking our line. Dad was fit to be tied. I could barely stay standing for lack of oxygen. Sally kept saying "where's my camera". I whooped out my new cell phone and snapped some pics, but I got now idea how the hell to get 'em offa this one... so no pics.

We finally got to the trough, Dad was happy. The food was excellent. The play was excellent. The day was excellent.... and hillarious.



Couple of vids thrown in.

Today in 1980 we lost him...







And yesterday in 1949 we gained him. Tom's got a lot to say. Christmas Card From A Hooker In Minneapolis.






And I can't find the toad. I think he's gonna be okey doke... he disappears for days at a time. :-)







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The Toad Got It.

So going back to this post you'll remember 'bout my toad. The one down in the basement. Well, being as we're in an old old farmhouse, we usually get a few mice that try to come in when winter comes and stake a claim... I'm not real jiggy with that whole plan, so I set traps. I'm pretty good at it too. I usually get up in the morning and go run the trap line and see if any meeses met their demise overnight.


I was all in a hurry this morning, we taped 2 more episodes of North Missouri Woodworking today and I had to get going, but about 6:30 am I heard a trap in the basement *SNAP!*.


I finally got time this evening to run down there. One trap sitting in front of the furnace tripped... no mouse. And then I looked over by the floor drain... the toad.


I came upstairs and told Sal.

Me: My toad got smacked by a mousetrap.

Sal: (who hates the toad and all that he represents and is completely creeped out by the fact that there is a toad in our basement.) *excited* REALLY?

Me: Yeah, he doesn't look so hot.

Sal: It's not dead?

Me: He's got a boo boo on his forehead, I'm gonna check on him in the morning.

Sal: *incredulous* What?

Me: Yeah, I think he's a little dazed right now. I'd put a bandaid on his little toady punkin but I don't think it'd stick and it might just make him crazy.

Sal: You need to shoot it.

Me: Shoot it? SHOOT IT?

Sal: Yeah, that thing just totally creeps me out. There's more of 'em down there you know. I saw 2 little toads the other day when I was down there. *shivers*

Me: You can't just go shootin' a person's toad just 'cause he got his punkin popped a little by a Victor mouse trap. I think he'll be alright. Hell honey, he's been down there over 3 years.

Sal: I can't believe this. You're actually gonna go check on him?

Me: Well yeah. That's a pretty doggone good toad down there honey. We've kinda connected. I think he knows me when he sees me.

Sal: *rolling her eyes*

Me: Maybe he'll grow a new head if that one falls off.

Sal: That's lizards and it's their tails, not their heads.

Me: Prove it.

Sal: *more eye rolling*



So, I'm gonna go down there in the morning and check on his toady little head and see how things are humming for him. I might take him a bug or something... if I can find one.

Just This...

Anything that I could possibly write here this evening would pale in comparison to the pictures of this evenings sunset here in North Missouri that my wife Sally took just a few minutes ago. So with that...


Click the pics.










Have a great evening.
J.





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Here I Am!

I figured I'd better post something so's y'all wouldn't think I was deader than a hammer.

Had a great Thanksgiving, did a little shopping, mostly window shopping. Went to Guitar Center yesterday which is like Disneyland for musicians. Played 'bout half the guitars and all of the mandolins there. Way cool place. I love just watching people there, everything from beginners to pros, country/folk musicians to death metal. You're completely surrounded by music of some sort from the time you walk in the door until you walk out. Even if you don't play it's worth a trip to one of their stores just to watch and listen.

Played Wii with my son in law and Sally. I'm addicted. lol What a blast that was.

Ate more food than you can shake a bowl full of jelly at. What a feed!

Came home and had an evening of visiting and having a few drinks with my buddy Gary and his daughter Sarah and Sal yesterday evening.

Sorry I was derelict in my duties... I'll do better. :-)



Have a great week everyone!






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Rollin' Rollin' Rollin', Keep Them Doggies Rollin'...

Well kids, tomorrow is payday. We got the herd in yesterday and sorted off calves to sell this morning. Got 'em shipped out to the auction barn about noon. I'm a wee bit scared with the whole economy thing and the cattle market being "off". In case you don't know how it all works... we sort off the calves that are ready to be weaned and moved to a feedlot or to grass somewhere. They go to an auction barn and buyers bid on them... and away they go. You don't have a whole lotta say, it's just whatever the market is at the time. It's been a pretty rough year all in all, with much MUCH higher than ever operating expenses for the cattle and now a shot to the nads with a depressed market.

On the plus side, this batch of calves is one of the best looking bunches we've sold for several years. There was plenty of grass with all the rain and the momma's milked like crazy, putting pounds on those babies. We sorted off 65 head to sell in this batch, all of 'em weighing in the 400-500 pound range with a few 600 pounders tossed in. We'll sell the rest of them in the spring after wintering 'em.

About 12 noon central time... keep your fingers crossed.

No one got trampled, kicked, maimed, wooled up. No gates broke open, no cows went bat turds and flew the coop. It was as calm and collected sorting morning as you'll ever see. Didn't make for any good stories but it sure was nice having an easy go at it.


Welp, some of y'all have purchased copies of the DVD from Chariton Valley Communications of my woodworking show and a few have got to see it without breaking out into congenital puking. In case you missed it, and from some of the talk over on the woodworking forum, I think you did... here's the phone number again.

660-395-9600

10 bucks and a little postage gets it to you. It'll make a good drink coaster after you watch it.



Ran across a silly little video the other day that I've watched repeatedly trying to figure out "what the???". Here tis...








Cute eh?



Have a great Tuesday y'all.




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Wine, Women, And Song.

WINE! Salute! Cheers! I coulda swore I wore underpants! MORE WINE!

My bloggin' buddy Katie is a pretty cool chick. She and her ol' man Clyde own themselves a right respectable lil' winery down south here a piece in Steelville, Missouri. Katie needed a frame, I make frames. I needed wine. Katie and Clyde make wine. Katie likes frames. I like wine.

We made a trade. I think I got the best part of this deal. I'm pretty certain of it.

Pugsly, my FedEx dude... wait. Wait. Yes, my FedEx drivers name is Pugsly. That's what he answers to. Yes, he looks just like a grown up version of Pugsly from The Adams Family. He's pretty cool. He likes delivering at our shop, usually just hangs out for awhile and visits.

Anyway, Pugsly pulls in and brings me in a box, I read the label and start ripping the box to shreds like a rabid dog after some sort of imaginary mailman leg in the box. I pull out a bottle of their Huzzah Valley Sweet Rosé AND a bottle of their Late Harvest Chardonel Dessert White.

I looked at Pugsly and said "You gotta go now. Goodbye" I ran to the house, briefly had the thought that it'd be awful if I fell right then... blew through the back door, slid to a stop in front of Sally and said....

"Wine. I'm thirsty."

Sal said "Me too."

Half a bottle later of the Huzzah and I was chasing Sally 'round the kitchen island like some sex crazed middle aged guy with a beard that plays mandolin, has cows and does woodworking. It was an amazing transformation. Utterly amazing.

Seriously folks, if you wanna taste some of the finest wine that comes from my home state here, this stuff is it. They've got a pretty extensive list of wines AND they do mail order and internet sales. You don't even have to get outta bed. Is America great or what?? I mean it!

Here's all their pertinent info.

Peaceful Bend Vineyard (click that like crazy)

Or give 'em a call 573-775-3000. If you live in CA, CO, ID, IL, IA, MN, MO, NM, OR, WA, WS, WV you're just a click or a phone call away from having this wonderful elixir of life and marital bliss, speeding it's way to your door via your very own Pugsly.

If by chance Katie or Clyde answers the phone themselves... just tell 'em you want the "Jace Special". It'll be good for a laugh anyhow when they say "whaaattt?"



Okay, music next. We played at one of our regular gigs the other night and it was a cooooolllldddd one. Pretty light crowd because of the temps, but we sure outdid the bar across the street. I think I saw one truck over there all night long and it belonged to the owner. HA!

As always, we had a barrel of fun.







And we shot the second episode of North Missouri Woodworking. It went awesomely and we had a great time and loosened it up a bit this time. Here I am suffering under the heat of all the lights. No I don't know what they're all there for... other than I need all the help I can get to look good.







Sorry... no women pics. I lied about that part.

Have a great one! CHEERS!!






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Hacksaw? HACKSAW???

Welp folks, we got to watch the first of the woodworking shows, "North Missouri Woodworking with Jace Weber" last evening and I am sooo impressed. Impressed with the quality of work that Martina, the producer and Drew, the cameraman/editor, turned out. I was totally blown away. If you remember when I wrote about it a couple of weeks ago, I didn't have a clue how they were gonna put it all together in the end with all of the "let's do that again but from this point this time" type of stuff.

I'm just amazed how that all works. Those 2 are really something.

My part turned out pretty nice as well and I was happy with it until I blurted out "Hacksaw". Yes, on a woodworking show I said hacksaw. Don't ask me what the hell was going through my thick rind' punkin' of a head when it flew outta my mouth. I was telling how to cut out a piece of wood on the bandsaw and said you could just as easily do it with a couple of different saw types if you didn't have a bandsaw.

What my brain said was "backsaw".

What rolled off my tongue was "hacksaw".


For the unknowing amongst y'all, here's a backsaw.







And this, is a hacksaw.









A backsaw is for woodworking, a hacksaw is for just hacking the crap out of the dangling tailpipe on your Buick or for sawing the aluminum hand railings off the stairs somewhere to sell for scrap, or even for getting under your sink and ruining all your plumbing. They're best for that. I've ruined more plumbing with a hacksaw than a politicians got promises.

Eh well, it made me laugh. And laughing at myself... well, I excell at that.


But truly people, these 2 made me look like an old pro. It's a pretty cool little show and entertaining too!



So, if y'all want a DVD of this show, call this number:

660-395-9600

That's Chariton Valley Communications. Tell 'em you wanna copy of "North Missouri Woodworking with Jace Weber". They'll probably question your sanity for a bit but just play along and they'll give in. :-) Seriously though, it'll be 'bout $10 bucks and a little postage probably.

Tell 'em I said to call.



Annnnnnddddd ... we're shooting episode NUMBER TWO tomorrow! Yessiree Bob. After this it looks like it's gonna be a once monthly program. I'm real grateful and real excited about this whole thing folks. I truly am.




Now then I wanna give a shout out to some friends of ours down in Knoxville, TN that run themselves one helluva set of radio stations, including one net radio station (you can listen to it on your puter) (technology... I tell you whut!) WDVX

Tony Lawson, Program Director

and

Red Hickey, DJ extraordinaire

These folks are online at www.wdvx.com Click on the "listen" button and choose the windows media player on the next page. Awesome AWESOME American style music.

Give 'em a listen, you'll love it. Great stuff!




Also Keota is playing tonite (Thursday, November 20) over in Bevier at Ugo's. We'll start playing about 7 pm. Come on over, we'll tear it up for y'all. I promise! Got some new stuff too!



Have a good one!
Jace





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