Friday, December 18, 2009

Another Happy Childhood Memory Obliterated. Jiffy Pop... You Suck.

Because it's a well known fact that I cannot leave well enough alone and just enjoy old memories... happy old memories... I must relive them. Then destroy them forever with my feeble and fumbling attempts at recreating them. For example, I give you Jiffy Pop Popcorn. This stuff was AWESOME as a kid, it always worked great, tons and tons of fluffy white popcorn magically poofing up under a tinfoil dome in a handy disposable pan. It was the best. The TV commercials were even happy.

Guess what Sally found in the store...



I was so dang wound up I almost poo'd myself with excitement!   I peeled the cardboard offa the top...






I sat it on the stove and lit a fire under that bad boy...





Let me just take a moment and point out our most incredible stove... A 1940ish Magic Chef that I tore down to nothing and rebuilt.  It makes Sal smile, me smile and virtually everyone that walks in our kitchen and sees it.   You're smiling right now aren't you?   I knew it.






And then the action began!!!!!!!!!  Up it started to rise...





And bigger....






And biggggger.....






And finally... GOOD LORD IT'S HUGE!!!!  I have no idea how Sally and I are gonna be able to eat all of that popcorn!!






And then I tore it open with a fork and....






What the hell??  There's like a mug of hard smoldering, half popped, crap...    I pour it in a bowl just because I was all prepared to have the time of my life eating Jiffy Pop.







I was almost in tears.  Such a sad sad evening at the Cowguy hacienda.  Truly sad.   I stood at the counter and picked around in the bowl trying to eat some of it and decided that I was just gonna bust a tooth if I kept up with that endeavor.  Sal hollared from the office "Honey did you burn a skillet full of junebugs or something in there?"  No...   Just another happy childhood memory, up in smoke.

I'll never learn.


*sigh.............*








.




12 comments:

Gwen said...

I want to come live in that stove!

Sorry about the popcorn. I think Jiffy-pop was awesome at the time because we didn't have any other fast way to make popcorn. I remember burning it half the time. :(

SkylersDad said...

I used to take Jiffy Pop camping with me in my backpack. I was always the hero, and everyone made sure I wasn't the one mauled by bears and lions.

Cora said...

They still make Jiffy Pop? Really? Are there actually people in America without microwave ovens? Dang. I feel so ritzy all of a sudden.

Sorry it didn't work out though, Cowguy. I guess you feel like I felt when I got that Slinkee I'd always wanted and then it wouldn't flip down the stairs like they promised on tv. Bummer. :-(

The Retired One said...

Same thing happened to me last year..I tried it and it was God awful..mostly burned and smoldering.
I think it is because the old stoves had those hard-ass coil burners and the popcorn popped not from the heat but by the muscle-aching friction you'd have to scrub back and forth to get enough heat to cook it.
Now? I will stick to my Orville's butter theatre microwave bags every time..but I still take it out about 15 seconds before it says it is done.
LOVE your stove, btw. It looks super. Man, if you went into being a plastic surgeon, just imagine what you could do?!!!
And get your mind out of thinking about boob jobs. I know that is where you were heading.....

Cowguy said...

Gwen... You can live in it, but it get's damned hot in there. Bring some lemonade.

Skylersdad... I gotta remember that. The bears and lions are like flies around here. :-)

Cora... Slinkys were like the most disappointing toy ever. I couldnt get the stair thing down either and then they'd tangle up and get bent and you were left with sticking the end under the hubcap on your dad's Buick and waiting to watch the mayhem happen when he drove off. You did that didn't you? I did.

The Retired Babe... I like boobs. I've been a fan for like forever. It's true!

Amy Kate said...

I don't think I ever saw Jiffy Pop until I was like 19, and found out that my aunt and cousins, who lived 3 minutes from us, ate Jiffy Pop all the time. What the what? We were Air Popper kids at our house. How did my mom and aunt grow up in the same house and have such different popcorning routines?

Ahem. That said, Gwen, I'm moving into the warming cabinet on the stove. I love love love it! We have a 1940s-ish double oven in the basement, and when (IF!)we redo the kitchen, I'm basing all redesigning around that stove/oven..

Cathi said...

That stove is to die for! It would look perfect in my 1950's style kitchen.

sAm said...

Bummer. That is a fabulous stove, though!!

Conquilts said...

Did you seriously say "poo'd"?

Alycia said...

Sorry about the Jiffy pop - but love the picture of your stove - was just like my grandmas and man could she cook some good things in it!! Thanks for the memory.

mo.stoneskin said...

I wish I was American.

Jerry said...

So sad. It just seemed poetic, popping that corn on that righteously refurbished relic.

I feel like I should send you a card. Scratch and sniff Redenbacher maybe? The popcorn, not the old guy's butt. LOL!