Saturday, March 22, 2008


The buzzards migrated back yesterday... good thing too! We're stop sign deep in dead stuff here in Missouri. The crows and coyotes and possums can consume only so much of this carnage, and a good percentage of them become roadkill themselves in the process of cleaning things up.

Sal and I ran into town today and must have been the full moon or something, but the body count was exceedingly high. So much in fact that we could have worked in 30 or 40 sessions of "Roadkill, The Game" in the 10 minute trip. On a chance I did a Wikipedia search for "roadkill". Solid gold, Eugene. I found out that someone (obviously Roadkill, The Game enthusiasts) had done some statistic compilation and the number that particularly snagged my attention...

Opossums - 19 million.

That's 19 million annually, nationwide, of one of the ugliest, nastiest, smelliest, thick headed creatures to ever walk the centerline and not make it on their own free will to the other side of the road.

That right there is a whole lotta possum. Gah!

Anyhow, on our way home we came upon some choice roadkill... a possum. Just your regular run of the mill, overgrown road rat, but arranged by chance in a pose that made Sal and I simultaneously cackle. I think I actually shot a load of the root beer I was sippin' on, out my nose.

To be honest, we both looked at one another and said "Picture!" I turned around and went back, Sally bailed out to risk death to snap some pics of this Pogo wannabe. I have no idea how to caption this, but Sal seemed to think he looked like he was trying to trip the next car that came by.

Thank God I married a woman with a warped sense of humor, huh?

Oh and a little sidetrip, while doing the Wikipedia search for Roadkill, lol I came across this guy... A professional wrestler known as "Roadkill, The Angry Amish Warrior". :-) Go get 'em Mose!


gracie said...

DANG! W/all the hungry buzzards coming back home, I sure hope they leave a few for us. The Roadkill Game is one of the highlights of our trip to MO.

Oh wait....I know where we can get some barn swallows ;)

Su Bee said...

ROFL - pssst, you know.......they're not REALLY dead........

Tigger said...

My first thought was...Hitch hiker with no arms.

you may now groan and shake your head.


Vicky said...

I'll see your "ugliest, nastiest, smelliest, thick headed creature" and raise you one nutria! Oh, wait, that's only in South Louisiana! LOL

debijeanm said...

OMG, Jace - you're killin' me! We think we had one of these living in our attic for a while, and my brother had a family raised in an old tub behind his garage. Eeuuuwww.

Bon said...

Funny story. We got them varmits here too. Seems to be a lot of them this Spring. I love Tigger's explanation.