Thursday, October 15, 2009

My Dad Just Called. The Bub Is Burned Out.

I'm leaning on the cabinet in front of the coffee pot this morning and the phone rings. It's my Dad. As you regular readers remember my Dad is 82, sharp as a tack and I love screwing with him.

Dad... You awake?

Me... Yup. What's up?

Dad... I need you to come up here and put a new light bub in the bathroom for us.

Okay, now what everyone else on earth calls a "light bulb"... you'll find a good portion of Missouri Rednecks pronounce it "light bub". Missouri grammar lesson is over.

Me... What? (I'm preparing him by warming up to this just a bit)

Dad... I need you to put a new light bub in the bathroom for us. It burned out last night.

Me... Light bub?

Dad... Yes. In the bathroom.

Me... What?

Dad... I SAID, I NEED YOU TO PUT A NEW LIGHT BUB IN THE BATHROOM. IT BURNED OUT LAST NIGHT.

Me... Bub in the bathroom?

Dad... Can you hear me at all?

Now I'm getting him all fired up 'cause his phone frustration level starts AND ends at about 2 on a scale of 1 to 10. He hates phones that don't work perfectly. His cell phone frustrates him like trying to jog in sweatpants 3 sizes to big... just running and fighting the crotch and not getting anywhere. Dad fights the phone.

Me... Yeah I think so. Your bathroom is something or another.

Dad... (dad holding the phone away from his face to tell my mother) I DON'T KNOW. (Mom saying something to dad) I AM TELLING HIM ABOUT THE BUB THAT'S BURNED OUT!!!

Dad... okay, so when are you coming up here?

Me... Do I need to bring wrenches?

Dad... What???

Me... For the bathroom.

Dad... DAMNIT!!!! THE BUB IS BURNED OUT IN MY BATHROOM. COME AND PUT IN A NEW BUB FOR US THIS MORNING!!!! DID YOU HEAR THAT??

Me... (laughing uncontrollably now) Yeah.. you need a new bub in the bathroom.

Dad... There really is something wrong with you. Good bye!




So, I'm gonna head up there and do.... well ... you know.














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15 comments:

Cora said...

*snicker* Messin' with the folks. I love it.

SkylersDad said...

That is brilliantly evil!

lilsis said...

That picture is slightly disturbing on many levels. I guess that is true for most pictures you round up.

I never knew there were anorexic cats until I saw this one.

I think I need chocolate, and bacon, and maybe a nap to recover.

Jennifer and Sandi said...

You are bad.....messing with your father. I'd be lookin over your shoulder today! *snicker*

- Jennifer

Oh My Goddess said...

There are Rednecks in Missouri?

Who knew?

JenJen said...

I'm layin in bed, sick as hell, and laughing my tushy off.

The Retired One said...

You are going straight to hell...
LMAOAFOF

Be nice to those old folks...with any luck someday you are going to be one too...

Vicky said...

You're just getting WAY too much fun screwing around with his head, aren't you? Bad boy!

Scope said...

Did you take him one of those 57 watt light bubs yu'r so all fired proud of?

Then tell him he's not supposed to read in there anyhow.

ahr8tch said...

I think Dad is right!

I've laughed all day just picturing that conversation.

Say, Jace! Just when did you learn about running in those over-sized sweat pants?

Jerry said...

Hey, since he raised you he only has himself to blame. LOL!

I thought changing bubs in the bathroom meant it was the next guy's turn.

Carl Vine said...

You know you got 'em good when they remind you that "there's something wrong with you!"

~E said...

I tried that with my dad and his new webcam once. I got a whole jalapeno pepper sneakily mushed in with my pesto pizza as a result.

Never again.

Stacie's Madness said...

i've NEVER heard this before...it's hilarious.

Greenmare said...

I am so giving you my mothers phone number, I really need someone to mess with her requests!