Thursday, January 24, 2008

I'm Frozen

It was so miserable cold here today all I could think about is warm weather. Feeding the cows this morning just plain hurt. I was in such a funk about the cold I would've traded all the cold in Missouri for a roomful of horseflies... and horseflies make me crazy. I've never heard of anyone making a trade like that and I dunno if it's feasible, but by golly I'd have done it. If you know anyone that's got a lot of horseflies and plenty of heat, send 'em my way. I'll deal.

The thing with horseflies is they can land on you and you can't feel 'em. I have no clue how the hell they pull this off, the things are huge. And it's not just landing on me that bugs me, I could deal with that... it's the biting thing. They bite so hard you bleed, literally, they make you bleed. They'll even bite thru a shirt. I'd like to see a horsefly's mouth under a microscope 'cause I'd bet $3.50 they've got buck teeth, or vampire teeth or something.

Anyway, we get these things for about a month in late summer and they make it darn hard to work outside in the late afternoon for that month span. They'll also cause you to go just a little insane.

I ran across this video the other day. In the midst of insanity from the dang things, I caught a horsefly, then I made a little lasso for him, then I played "round 'em up." There's no sound so just hum the theme from Rawhide.



Thinking it over after all this, maybe I'd rather have the cold. Ask me tomorrow morning when I'm cold again.

9 comments:

Vicky said...

Jace, honey, are you bored? ROFLOL. Reminds me of that guy in the movie "Midnight in the Garden of Good & Evil." You're not going to go poisoning the town well or anything, are you? But if it's any consolation, it's cold and rainy here, too! (Hugs)

Kim said...

I'm kind of guessing our California "cold and rainy" is probably a little different from your MO "freezing your rear end off" weather. Vicky's either just trying to be really nice or is suffering severe withdrawl symptoms from lack of fabric buying and is out of her mind. Anyway . . . I hear serial killers often start off by torturing small animals. And it's a little creepy how much joy you seemed to be getting. I'm just saying . . . .

Cowguy said...

"Jace, honey, are you bored?"

Never. :-)

"Reminds me of that guy in the movie "Midnight in the Garden of Good & Evil." You're not going to go poisoning the town well or anything, are you?"

I've tried a couple of times to make it through that movie... and failed. 2 1/2 - 3 hours is too much for a movie without laserweapons or bikini clad chicks on motorcycles. But "no".

No plans to poison the town, today.

"Vicky's either just trying to be really nice or is suffering severe withdrawl symptoms from lack of fabric buying and is out of her mind."

I've heard the screams of withdrawal all the way out here in the middle.

Everything else, dang Kim..... thanks for the positive comment.

Kim said...

You're expecting positive comments from me? Dang cold froze your brain! If it's any consolidation, though, my husband came in and said, "who's that?" So I played the little video clip for him and he laughed and chuckled his way back out to the recliner. I don't know. Maybe it's a guy thing.

Kim said...

That's not supposed to be "consolidation"--it should be "consolation." I get confused over big words before 9 a.m.

Dick said...

I'm familiar with cow wranglers and horse wranglers,but you're the first horsefly wrangler I've come across. I just can't wait for your blogs when calving season starts. ;)

Cowguy said...

"my husband came in and said, "who's that?" So I played the little video clip for him and he laughed and chuckled his way back out to the recliner. I don't know. Maybe it's a guy thing."

Your honey pie has excellent taste in humor. He is to be commended.

Cowguy said...

"I'm familiar with cow wranglers and horse wranglers,but you're the first horsefly wrangler I've come across. I just can't wait for your blogs when calving season starts."

Dick is a friend of mine and an old cowhand from waaaay back when cows had just evolved into warm blooded creatures. He favors Herefords, but i can hardly hold that against him.

Yeah, calving season is usually good for some incidents. :-)

Thanks for comin' 'round Dick!

Kim said...

He has excellent taste in wives too, although his experience has been limited.